Shadows
by Shonetta
Summary: JC postendgame Janeway and Chakotay try to come to terms with an event from the Voyager years that is keeping them from happiness rated 'R' for adult subject matter
1. Chapter 1

**_Star Trek Voyager_ characters are the property of Paramount Pictures**

SHADOWS  
(R)

I

2379

Sitting before a roaring fire in a quaint Austrian chalet, Kathryn poured B'Elanna a cup of coffee. It was now a year since Voyager had returned, and the senior crew were marking the first anniversary with a vacation on the wintery Alps. Tuvok was unable to make it, due to professional commitments, and Seven was also absent as she had joined Starfleet and was on a deep space mission. The Doctor had come, however, as had Harry and Chakotay. Tom and B'Elanna were staying in a chalet close by, as was Chakotay, but Harry and the Doctor were staying in the resort's grand hotel.

"I don't understand it," B'Elanna said as she picked up her cup of coffee.

"Don't understand what?" Kathryn asked, sitting opposite her.

"What's going on with you and Chakotay. I know it's none of my business, but..."

"You're right," Kathryn replied, her voice stern, "it's none of your business."

"But he loves you," B'Elanna persisted. "And I know you love him. I can understand why you didn't get together on Voyager, but we've been home a year now and..."

"And as I said," Kathryn interrupted. "It's none of your business!"

"But it's a waste of love. Give him a chance, Kathryn...give yourself a chance. You'd be a great couple..."

"I don't want to hear it!" Kathryn cried, getting to her feet. "I'm old enough, and tough enough, to know my own mind. And if you're not going to quit on this, I suggest you leave."

"Fine!" B'Elanna retorted, rising to her feet. "If that's what you want. But I'll never understand why you're throwing his love aside like it's trash. He's a good, decent, man and any woman would be lucky to be loved by him. But I don't suppose you think like that, do you? After all, he's ex-Maquis and you wouldn't want to jeopardize your precious standing in Starfleet by getting involved with him, would you? Well, I think it stinks, and if that's really what you think, he's better off without you!"

Without waiting for a reply, she stormed towards the door, opened it, and stepped into the black night. As she did so, she bumped into Chakotay, who was just arriving at the chalet

"I wouldn't bother if I were you," she cried, her face like thunder. "You're nothing but ex-Maquis trash. Spend your time with real friends."

With that, she hurried off into the snow.

"What was all that about?" Chakotay asked as he stepped into Kathryn's chalet.

"You don't want to know," Kathryn replied.

"Try me," he said, closing the door.

"I don't want to talk about it," Kathryn answered. She then gestured to the couch. "Please, take your coat off and help yourself to coffee. It's fresh."

Chakotay took off his coat, put it up on a hook by the door, and went to sit where B'Elanna had formerly sat. "What ever bee's in B'Elanna's bonnet," he said, picking up the pot of coffee, "the chances are I'll hear about it. You may aswell give me your version."

Kathryn gazed vacantly into the roaring flames before her, a million thoughts chasing each other in her mind. B'Elanna had been right, she and Chakotay were throwing away their love, and it was all such a waste...

"Well?" Chakotay persisted.

"If you really want to know," Kathryn said, turning back to him, "it was about us. B'Elanna thinks we should be a couple, and thinks the reason we're not is because you're an ex-Maquis."

"I see," Chakotay replied, averting his eyes.

"You know what she's like...once she sees red, she's like a bull in a china shop."

"I'll talk to her," Chakotay said quietly.

Kathryn hesitated with the next words and had to muster all her strength to say them. "Maybe it's us who should talk, Chakotay. We've never dealt with what happened...maybe it's time we did."

At that, Chakotay got up and walked over to the chalet's small window. "I can't go there, Kathryn," he said painfully "I've spent every day of the past four years trying to get over what happened, and I can't re-open those wounds."

Slowly, Kathryn got up and joined him at the window. "What tortures me most is how it tortures you. I wish it didn't...there was nothing else you could have done."

A tear ran down Chakotay's cheek. "All I ever wanted to do on Voyager was keep you safe," he said quietly, "but I hurt you most."

"You've never hurt me," she tried to reassure him, "and I know you never would. You're the kindest, most gentle man I've ever known. I don't know how I would have got through the Voyager years without you." Tears filled her own eyes. "You're the best friend I ever had, Chakotay, and I love you."

Chakotay turned to her tearfully. "How can you love me? I'm not worth your love...I as good as raped you."

"No," Kathryn cried, the words taking her by surprise. "You didn't...How can you think that?"

"Because it's true," he argued. "And I struggle every day to live with that."

"You mustn't think that," she said, putting a gentle hand on his shoulder. "And I had no idea you thought that..."

"I'm sorry," Chakotay said, breaking away from her. "I can't talk about this."

He walked towards the door and Kathryn turned after him.

"Don't go," she beseeched. "We have to talk about this..."

But Chakotay was already half-way out the door, and it slammed shut behind him.


	2. Chapter 2

**Star Trek Voyager Characters are the property of Paramount Pictures**

II

FOUR YEARS EARLIER

Sitting on a hard bench in a windowless silver cell, only a white robe between her and indecency, Kathryn rubbed her weary eyes.

"I can't take much more of this," she said to Chakotay who was sitting on the bench opposite. "We're not lab-rats for them to prod and poke!"

"Let's hope we don't have to take much more of it," Chakotay answered. "The crew will have realized we're missing by now and it's only a matter of time before they find us."

"This ship is cloaked, Chakotay. How the hell are they going to find us?"

"I'm sure B'Elanna will find a way." He got up and went to sit beside her. "And it's not like you to be negative."

"I know," Kathryn admitted. "But how can we compete with a species who managed to intercept our shuttle without us even knowing it? They're too advanced for us, Chakotay. The crew will never find us."

Chakotay was just about to reply when the door opened and two aliens stepped in. They were one of the most hideous species Kathryn had ever seen, with black scaly skin and red eyes, and were completely genderless.

"I demand that you release us," Kathryn said, getting to her feet. "You have no right to keep us captive."

"Calm yourself," the tallest alien said. "We will release you once we have completed biometric evaluation."

"That is unacceptable," Kathryn cried. "Release us immediately!"

The aliens made no reply.

Kathryn stepped forward defiantly. "I said release us immediately!"

Again no reply. Kathryn swallowed. She was rarely intimidated, but these aliens were sinister and cold. "Look," she said, trying a softer approach. "Any information you want on our species, we will gladly send to you once we are back on our ship."

"Unacceptable," the alien replied. "And the less trouble you make, the sooner we will be finished, and the sooner you can leave."

"But what more can you possibly want with us?" Kathryn asked. "You've poked us and scanned us and stimulated us all day!"

"We wish to see how your species procreates."

Kathryn's jaw dropped and it was a moment before she could find her voice. "Excuse me?"

"We conclude, from our examinations, that in your species reproduction is achieved by physical union of reproductive organs. We wish to observe."

"Then you will have to wish away," Kathryn retorted. "It's out of the question!"

"If you wish to see your ship again," the alien threatened. "You will oblige us."

"Never!" Kathryn cried.

"So far we have been most accommodating," the alien continued, "but in return we expect accommodation. Until you co-operate, we will keep you in here without any sustenance."

"Flawed logic," Kathryn stated. "We'll be no use to you dead."

The alien smirked. "We have found even the most stubborn of captives yields in the face of death."

"You can't do this," Kathryn replied. "It's blackmail..."

The alien and his companion turned to leave. "Call it what you wish, it is most effective."

With that, they stepped out of the room and locked the door.

* * *

THREE DAYS LATER

Starving, and suffering from dehydration, Kathryn and Chakotay lay side by side on the floor of their cell. Chakotay was unconscious and Kathryn was struggling herself to stay awake. Every part of her body was dying, and it was getting harder and harder not to sleep.

Suddenly, the door to the cell opened, and the two aliens who checked on them every few hours, appeared.

"Alright," Kathryn said as they entered the room. "We'll do it..."

The alien smiled. "We knew you'd be reasonable." He hit a gold badge on his right arm. "Our guests are now co-operating. Beam them to the infirmary and restore them to health."

Before Kathryn knew it, a red light engulfed her and she felt the familiar tingle of transportation.

* * *

"No way," Chakotay said when they were alone in their cell after treatment. "I'm not doing it."

"We have no choice," Kathryn argued. "If we don't, we'll die."

"They're just trying to bully us. Like you said, we're no use to them dead."

"And if we don't give them what they want, we're no use to them alive. We have to do this, Chakotay. It's our only hope of escape."

Chakotay stepped closer. "And how do we know they'll keep their word? How do we know they'll release us and not kill us?"

"We don't know," Kathryn conceded. "We have to take a chance."

Chakotay turned to the wall in frustration and leant his palms against it. "I can't, Kathryn. I can't do it."

Kathryn closed the gap between them and put her hand on his shoulder. "You can. We can. All they want is to see how our species mates. Basic biology, that's all we have to give them."

Chakotay turned to her slowly, tears in his eyes. "But to...I can't, Kathryn...not like that. There's got to be another way."

"There isn't," she answered. "Please, don't make me order this..."

Chakotay turned away again, a tortured soul. "I'd rather die than do that to you...but..." a tear ran down his cheek, "but if to do it means you'll live, how can I not?

"That's the way to look at it," Kathryn said reassuringly. She then put her hand on his back, a small gesture of comfort. "I know how you feel about me, Chakotay, and I know you know I feel the same. Let's just be grateful that it's you and me in this situation...that we're not here with someone else."

Another tear ran down Chakotay's cheek. "I love you so much, Kathryn."

"I love you," she whispered. "And this won't change anything between us, I promise."

The door behind them opened, and the two familiar aliens appeared.

"Our physician says you are sufficiently recovered to demonstrate reproduction. We will thus transport you to the laboratory."

* * *

When Kathryn and Chakotay arrived at the laboratory, three aliens in blue robes were standing by a bed waiting for them.

"We conclude," the leader alien said, "that the act of reproduction is performed horizontally. We have thus equipped the bed with scanning devices which will provide us with images of internal action. All that remains is for us to attach several devices to your bodies, which will record various data."

"This is sick," Chakotay cried. "In our world it's a crime to force people to do what you're asking!"

"It is simple biology," the alien replied. "All we require is biological data."

Chakotay was about to argue, but Kathryn spoke instead. "There's no use arguing, Chakotay. They have no comprehension of what intimacy means in our culture. Let's just get this over with."

The two subordinate aliens each picked up a box of devices and the dominant alien spoke.

"Please remove your robes."

Kathryn did as she was asked, but Chakotay didn't move.

"Chakotay..." she urged.

At Kathryn's prompt, Chakotay reluctantly took off his robe.

As soon as they were both naked, the two subordinate aliens stepped forward and attached a thin device to their chest, their forehead, and their abdomens. Then they stepped aside.

"We will now begin," the dominant alien said. "Take your places on the bed and begin demonstration."

Kathryn walked over to the bed and Chakotay reluctantly followed. He was trembling, as was she, and Kathryn took his hand in hers. "We can do this...for each other."

Chakotay looked at her, his eyes brimming with tears, and nodded.

* * *

Back on Voyager, Kathryn and Chakotay made their way from the shuttle-bay to sickbay in silence. Once the biological studies were complete, the aliens had kept their word and had returned both their uniform and their shuttle. As soon as their shuttle was released from the ship, Tuvok had contacted them, and in less than an hour they were back on Voyager. The return ride, however, had been a stark contrast to the departing one. Then they had talked and laughed and just generally enjoyed each others company, but they had made the trip home in silence, only communicating when necessary.

"Captain, Commander," the Doctor smiled when they arrived at sickbay. "I'm glad to see you have returned safe and sound. We were beginning to think we'd lost you forever."

"No doubt Tuvok has informed you," Kathryn said, her tone sharer than usual, "that we were taken captive by advanced aliens and subjected to intense biometric examination."

"Yes," the Doctor replied. "Were the examinations made against your will?"

"No, Doctor," Kathryn replied sarcastically, "we gladly volunteered to be prodded and poked like lab-rats. And the last thing we want is another examination, so make this as brief as possible."

"Yes, Captain," the Doctor said again. He picked up his medical tricorder and gestured to a bed. "Please, lie down."

"I am fine standing," Kathryn answered. "Just get on with it." At that, the Doctor began to scan her, and Kathryn spoke again. "You will see indication of copulation, but that is not to be put in our files, understood?"

The Doctor's eyes widened. "You mean...they made you..."

Kathryn cut him short. "I said, understood?"

The Doctor nodded in sad submission. "Understood."

* * *

In the privacy of her ready-room, Kathryn sat by her desk and gazed absently into a cup of coffee in her hands. It had been late morning when they arrived back on Voyager, and while the Doctor had recommended she take the day off to recuperate, the last thing she wanted was to sit in her quarters going over what had happened. She needed to keep busy, needed something to take her mind off what had happened. Suddenly, her door chime sounded and she looked up from her coffee. "Come in."

The doors slid open and Chakotay came in. He held a pad in his hand and took it over to her. "The report you requested."

Kathryn took the pad and put it down on her desk. "Thank you."

The atmosphere was so tense between them that it was suffocating.

Without another word, Chakotay turned around to leave. As he did so, Kathryn got to her feet.

"Chakotay..."

At the sound of his name, Chakotay turned to face her.

Kathryn left her desk and closed the gap between them. "We need to talk about this."

"I can't," Chakotay said, tears filling his eyes. "I don't even want to think about it."

Gently, Kathryn put her hand on his arm. "We have to, Chakotay. We have to deal with what happened and move on."

"How can we deal with it?" he asked. "I don't know, Kathryn. All I know is that I don't want to think about it."

"We have to get passed it," she insisted. "We have too..."

Chakotay stepped away. "I've got to get back to the bridge."

As he turned to leave, Kathryn seized his arm. "Don't run away from this, Chakotay...or from me. We did what we had to to live..."

Chakotay turned back to her and a tear ran down his cheek. "And I'd rather be dead than feel what I do right now..."

Tears flooded Kathryn's eyes at that, and through blurred vision, she saw Chakotay leave the room.

* * *

All was quiet on the bridge when Kathryn ventured there that evening. Chakotay was sitting in his seat, a hunched and tortured figure, and was staring at the console before him as though it wasn't there. Slowly, Kathryn walked over to him and stood beside him.

"Our dinner's getting cold."

At the sound of her voice, Chakotay flinched.

Kathryn spoke again. "Are you joining me?"

Chakotay looked up at her, infinite pain in his eyes. "For what?"

"Dinner..."

Chakotay looked away and said nothing.

"We always have dinner on a Wednesday. I've made your favorite dish."

Silence.

"We won't talk about what happened," she said. "We don't ever have to mention it again if you don't want too."

At that, Chakotay's eyes met hers again. "Then I'll come as soon as I've finished here."

Kathryn gave a wan smile and put her hand on his shoulder. "Be sure that you do."


	3. Chapter 3

**_Star Trek Voyager characters are the property of Paramount Pictures_**

**III**

**2379**

Standing in falling snow, Chakotay's forgotten coat in her hands, Kathryn knocked on the door of his chalet. When she got no reply, she tried the handle and found that the door was unlocked. Slowly, she pushed it open and stepped into the lodging. As soon as she did, she saw Chakotay sitting on the floor, his back against the couch, weeping. Her heart aching at his pain, she closed the door, put down his coat, and went over to him.

"Chakotay," she said, kneeling beside him in concern.

"Just leave me alone, Kathryn," he wept. "Just forget about me and get on with your life."

"With all due respect," Kathryn replied gently, "I can't do that. I love you, Chakotay. I want you in my life."

Chakotay looked up at her, the pain in his eyes hurtful to behold. "Why? So I can ruin your life like I've ruined the lives of everyone I love? Damn it, Kathryn! I've already ruined your life!"

"No you haven't," she answered. "I can't imagine my life without you, and I don't want to imagine it. What's ruining my life is us being apart."

"I raped you," Chakotay cried. "How could I do anything worse?"

At that, Kathryn seized his hands. "Now you listen to me, Chakotay, and you listen good. You didn't rape me. You would never rape me. We did what we had to do to survive. You have to accept that and stop beating yourself up."

"I can't," he said, breaking away from her and getting to his feet. "Every day it's tortured me..."

"Then the torture's got to stop," Kathryn answered, also standing. "You saved my life, Chakotay...we saved each other's lives. We had no choice..."

"It was rape, Kathryn," Chakotay insisted. "They raped your mind, I raped your body."

"That's not true. You're twisting what happened to fuel your guilt. You did nothing wrong. Hell, Chakotay, if you raped me then I raped you. Is that what you think? Is that what you want me to believe?"

Chakotay tearfully stepped away from her. "My body responded, Kathryn...while you lay there in pain and fear, my body had pleasure. How can it all be anything but rape? Tell me, Kathryn!"

His words momentarily silenced her. She had never thought of it from that point of view..that while the experience had been an ordeal for them both, he had the guilt of arousal. "You're right," she said quietly. "It was rape. I raped you."

"No," Chakotay protested.

"Yes," Kathryn answered, a tear running down her cheek. "The body responds to stimulation, even if the mind is unwilling, and my hands stimulated you. And being aroused like that...in a situation of fear...is harder to deal with than having felt only pain. Because of the pleasure, you feel like you enjoyed it, and I know that you didn't. I'm so sorry, Chakotay."

"You have nothing to be sorry for," he replied. "It was me...all..." He turned away again. "I hate myself so much. I've tried everything to forget, but I can't...I can't come to terms with what happened."

Kathryn stepped closer. "Maybe we need help, Chakotay. What happened is ruining our lives and we can't let that happen. I love you and you love me. B'Elanna's right. We can't throw that away."

"It's too late," Chakotay answered. "I can't forget what happened, Kathryn, and as long as I remember, I can never be the man you need."

Kathryn bit her lip and was a moment with the next words. "Then maybe we shouldn't remember."

Chakotay turned to her sharply. "And how are we supposed to forget?"

"By having those memories erased."

Chakotay flinched. "You're serious."

Kathryn nodded. "I know you don't agree with memory erasure, and neither do I most of the time, but we have to ask ourselves not what we lose by erasing those memories, but what we gain by retaining them. And I can think of nothing, Chakotay."

Chakotay gazed at her, the longing for peace in his eyes saying more than a million words.

Kathryn took his hands in hers and squeezed them. "It would only take a few minutes, Chakotay. A few minutes and all this pain would be gone. We could enjoy the rest of our lives...together."

Chakotay let go of her left hand and touched her cheek. "I love you so much, Kathryn. I've always loved you. But I don't deserve you..."

"That is your guilt and pain talking," Kathryn answered. "Remember how it used to be between us, Chakotay. Remember our moonlight sails on Lake George and all the games we played together on the holodeck. Remember how much we enjoyed just being with each other. We can have that again, Chakotay." She put her hand over his and kissed it. "Let's lose those memories and gain the rest of our life."

Chakotay nodded tearfully. "Let's do it."

* * *

"If we go to my clinic," the Doctor said as Kathryn and Chakotay discussed their desire with him in his hotel room an hour later, "I can do the erasure now. It's a simple procedure."

"That's very kind of you," Kathryn replied, "but we wouldn't want to intrude on your vacation time."

"Not at all. My only plan for tonight is cyber oblivion until morning. I'll be glad to perform the surgery...that is if you are ready to have it so soon."

"The sooner the better," Kathryn answered.

"Then matter settled," the Doctor smiled.

"Before we do this," Chakotay injected, "I want to know how it will affect us. I mean, what will we feel afterwards? Will we be confused or disorientated or have a multitude of blanks in memory?"

"Hopefully none of those," the Doctor replied. "When the procedure is finished, I'll give you a little something to make you sleep, and then transport you to directly to your chalet beds. I'll check on you both during the night, just to make sure all is well, and put a couple of empty bottles of wine in both your chalets. When you wake up in the morning, you'll have no recollection of the procedure, our conversation, or any conversation you've had together regarding this subject, and will put your grogginess and memory fog of events this evening down to a hang-over. All your current memories of the Voyager years will be the same, only you will not remember this specific incident. You will remember only that you were taken by those aliens for biometric examination."

Kathryn turned to Chakotay and took his hand in hers. "Let's have it done now, Chakotay. We've lived with those memories long enough."

Chakotay nodded. "We'll have it done now, Doctor."

The Doctor smiled. "Then all that remains is for you to fetch your night wear. When you get back, I'll request direct transport."

* * *

The Doctor's state of the art clinic in San Francisco was equipped for all medical procedures, and as he prepared for the surgery, Kathryn and Chakotay changed in separate pre-op rooms into their night-wear. When they were dressed, they made their way into the surgery, arriving almost the same time.

"The only decision now," the Doctor said, leaving a biobed, "is which of you goes first."

Chakotay turned to Kathryn. "I want you to go first. I need to be sure you've had it done."

Kathryn flinched. "Don't you trust me?"

Tears filled Chakotay's eyes. "I need to be sure...please."

At the pain in his eyes, Kathryn relented. "Very well. I'll go first."

The Doctor gestured to the prepared biobed. "Please lie down, Admiral."

Kathryn went over to the biobed and did as he asked. The Doctor then turned to Chakotay. "Please return to the pre-op room."

"No," Chakotay replied. "I want to watch..."

The Doctor protested. "I'm afraid I cannot permit..."

Kathryn interrupted him. "Let him stay, Doctor."

The Doctor sighed. "If he must." He gestured to a distant chair. "Please sit quietly."

Chakotay went over to the chair and sat down. He could see Kathryn's face and she smiled reassuringly. "It will soon be over, Chakotay. See you in our new life."

The Doctor then put a hypospray to her neck and she fell asleep.

* * *

The following morning, a distant knocking woke Kathryn. Groggily, she got out of bed, put on her night-robe, and went to answer the door. It was B'Elanna.

"B'Elanna," Kathryn said. "Come in."

B'Elanna stepped into the chalet. "Did I wake you?"

"Yes, but time I got up anyway," Kathryn answered. "What time is it exactly?"

"Just after ten."

"Ten?" Kathryn exclaimed in surprise.

B'Elanna smiled. "Had too much to drink last night?"

"I guess I must have," Kathryn replied. "I certainly feel hung-over." She gestured to the couch. "Please, take a seat. Would you like a coffee?"

"I'd love one," B'lanna answered. "But first I'd like to apologize."

Kathryn frowned. "What for?"

"For the way I behaved last night. You were right, what Chakotay and you do is none of my business."

"Now I know I had too much to drink," Kathryn said, going over to the replicator, "as I haven't the faintest idea what you're talking about."

"One hang-over to be grateful for then," B'Elanna continued. "I was way out of line."

Kathryn replicated two cups of coffee and picked them up as she spoke. "Strange thing is, I don't remember drinking last night. I can't remember what I did last night. I remember having dinner with you and the guys and coming back here, but I can't remember a thing after that."

"Last time I saw you," B'Elanna said. "Chakotay was here."

Kathryn walked towards the table. "He was?"

B'Elanna nodded.

"I guess we must have..." She stopped talking when she saw two empty bottles of wine on the table and a couple of glasses. "Well, there we go," she laughed. "The incriminating evidence."

B'Elanna laughed too and joined her former captain in the seating area. "Am I forgiven?"

Kathryn smiled warmly. "Absolutely."

* * *

"Not joining us on the slopes?" Harry asked as Kathryn took a seat on the hotel's veranda after lunch.

"I think I'll pass today," she replied. "But you go break a leg...not literally, of course..."

Harry laughed. "Of course." He walked onto the snow. "See you later, Admiral."

"Have fun," she smiled.

With that, Harry walked off and Kathryn relaxed into a very comfortable wicker chair. Just as she was about to open a brochure that was on the table, she heard Chakotay's voice.

"Here you are," he said. "I've been looking for you all over."

Kathryn looked up and saw him standing before her. He looked weary and she smiled. "You look like I feel."

Chakotay smiled in return and sat beside her. "I think we overdid the wine last night."

"Just a little bit," Kathryn teased. "I found two empty bottles this morning."

"So did I."

"Really?" She put down the brochure in her hands. "No wonder we're hung-over. We must have had a couple of drinks at your place and at mine."

A young girl in a traditional Austrian outfit approached him. "May I get you both a drink?"

"I'll have a blueberry juice," Kathryn replied.

"Me too," Chakotay answered. "Thank you."

The girl smiled. "Two blueberry juices coming right up."

As she left, Kathryn looked out at the spectacular mountains before her. "It's so beautiful here, Chakotay. I can't believe how quickly this weekend has gone. I don't want to leave tomorrow."

"Then don't," he said. "Let's stay...just you and me."

Kathryn turned to him, her eyes sparkling. "We could, couldn't we?"

Chakotay nodded, the same light in his eyes.

"Then let's stay," Kathryn said happily. "And let's ditch our chalets and try for one of those exquisite log-cabins by the lake.."

Chakotay smiled, dimples showing. "I'll go and request a reservation."

* * *

Standing on the balcony of a luxurious log-cabin the following evening, Kathryn looked out at a copper lake in the setting sun. She and Chakotay had just dined at the resort's finest restaurant, and she was stylishly dressed in a sumptuous gown of blue velvet that fell off her shoulders and kissed her knees.

"Glorious, isn't it?" Chakotay said, joining her on the balcony, also formally dressed in a black shirt and white pants.

"Magnificent," Kathryn replied. "I'm so glad we decided to stay."

Chakotay stood beside her and gazed at her in the golden light. "You look so beautiful tonight."

Kathryn smiled and turned to him. "Don't I always look beautiful?"

Chakotay looked deep into her eyes. "Always..."

Kathryn could hardly breath as they looked at each other, and the splendor around her faded away as her senses became aware of nothing but him. As Chakotay took her hand in his, her whole body tingled.

"I've missed you, Kathryn," he said quietly. Since they had returned from the Delta Quadrant, they had hardly seen each other at all. He had been on an archaeological expedition to deep space and she had been working full-time at Starfleet Headquarters.

"I've missed you too," Kathryn confessed.

"And I will go on missing you," Chakotay continued, "for as long as we're apart." Tenderly, he reached out and touched her face. "I don't want us to be apart anymore. There's no command-structure now, no ship, no crew ... no parameters. There's just you and me." His voice fell to a whisper. "I love you so much, Kathryn."

Kathryn smiled and a happy tear escaped her eye. "I love you too, Chakotay."

Tears of joy filled his eyes, and Kathryn wrapped her arms around his neck as his arms gathered her against him.

For a long time they held each other tight, both cherishing the closeness, and then, in the glow of the setting sun, their lips finally met in the first tender kiss of forever.

**THE END**


End file.
